Friday, January 15, 2010
january 15, 2010
Today is another day. My younger daughter just started on psych medication and is going through the beginning phases. I kinda makes you feel high. It will for a while until your body gets used to taking it. I have my granddaughter for the weekend. hurray!! My older daughter is completely miserable being pregnant. Nothing seems to go right. She's bipolar big time. I just found out that I can get a 3 bedroom apartment but don't have the security deposit for it. So I'm totally bummed out about that. I'm scheduled to go for my hearing for disability soon, I'm a nervous wreck about that. So I have to take one day at a time. I've been kinda depressed but I can't let it kick my ass. Just be grateful for what I have.
Sunday, January 10, 2010
January 10, 2010
Hope today is a good day. It's very difficult dealing with my daughter. She's 8 weeks pregnant and is going through the worst first trimester. On top of her being bipolar, she's a bundle of hormones. She's not eating and that dosen't help. Her boyfriend is an asshole from hell. Hope he goes to jail soon. He's always in trouble. I must say I love my daugher deaply and I only want the best for her.
Thinking of moving to a bigger place, God knows how I'm gonna come up with a security deposit. I need a job but I don't know how I'm going to swing it with the illness. I have problems with all kinds of issues when it comes to dealing with people in the workplace. Everyday I think it's going to get better but it doesn't. I just wish I could get back on the stick. I have problems processing and I feel slow about figuring things out. I feel I'm going to catch up on things but it just doesn't happen. I always think it's the med's but I just can't stop them, I'll be a mess. I just hope for a better day tomorrow.
Thinking of moving to a bigger place, God knows how I'm gonna come up with a security deposit. I need a job but I don't know how I'm going to swing it with the illness. I have problems with all kinds of issues when it comes to dealing with people in the workplace. Everyday I think it's going to get better but it doesn't. I just wish I could get back on the stick. I have problems processing and I feel slow about figuring things out. I feel I'm going to catch up on things but it just doesn't happen. I always think it's the med's but I just can't stop them, I'll be a mess. I just hope for a better day tomorrow.
Friday, January 8, 2010
January 8, 2010
I've incorporated some exersize into my day. This is a good thing not only for my bipolar but for my waistline. Exersize helps to send oxygen to the brain and the brain is where the bipolar is generated from. I didn't have such a good week with the medication. I forgot to take the evening doses. But not to worry, I'm right back on track. That happens every so often. You can't beat yourself up about it. Luckily the medication is into the body so much, it dosen't cause to many problems. however, when I get so neglectful, I start to get the symptoms back. I find that alot of it is a mind set. Whenever I start to feel like the symptoms coming back I try to talk myself out of it.
Monday, January 4, 2010
Flashbacks of the past
Wow...watching my daughter and her friend who is also bipolar, brings back all of the flashbacks of the past. The impulsive behavior, permiscuity, and above all the loud mouths.
Saturday, January 2, 2010
living with a bipolar daughter
Today is a new day!!...got up early and went shopping.. That's an impulse I still have of my bipolar illness. Spending money like water.
I'm dealing everyday with a bipolar daughter, her name is Stephany. Yes she's the daughter that just found out she's pregnant. She is on no medication and boy how she's a time bomb. She lives with me right now. I watch the way she goes and it's scary. Her mood can change on the dime. I try very hard to deal with her delicately, It's very hard being that I'm full blown bipolar myself.
Stephany does things that are impulsive and unimaginable. I love her dearly but I'm looking forward to day when she moves out. I need my privacy back as well as my sanity. I don't know how she's gonna do being a new mother. The boyfriend is now gone and she'll have to raise this baby on her own. It's very frustrating being involved in it all and watching the disaster happen.
Thank God for my sister's, I get alot of support from them. They deal with me and my bipolar wonderfully. Support is a very essential part of recovery when bipolar. Sometimes I wonder how I do it living with Stephany. I have strong faith and am a very strong individual. Well for whoever reads this, keep the faith and stay strong. It gets better.
I'm dealing everyday with a bipolar daughter, her name is Stephany. Yes she's the daughter that just found out she's pregnant. She is on no medication and boy how she's a time bomb. She lives with me right now. I watch the way she goes and it's scary. Her mood can change on the dime. I try very hard to deal with her delicately, It's very hard being that I'm full blown bipolar myself.
Stephany does things that are impulsive and unimaginable. I love her dearly but I'm looking forward to day when she moves out. I need my privacy back as well as my sanity. I don't know how she's gonna do being a new mother. The boyfriend is now gone and she'll have to raise this baby on her own. It's very frustrating being involved in it all and watching the disaster happen.
Thank God for my sister's, I get alot of support from them. They deal with me and my bipolar wonderfully. Support is a very essential part of recovery when bipolar. Sometimes I wonder how I do it living with Stephany. I have strong faith and am a very strong individual. Well for whoever reads this, keep the faith and stay strong. It gets better.
